Sunday, September 21, 2014

it's been a year since my last post



Something drew me back here, i don't know what it is, but i can feel it, in my veins, my arteries heck even in my toenails.

I want to write about this thing called emotions. Something felt in the heart, in the gut, and you can't really do justice to it by giving it a mere name. Exactly? I don't know what is the word to describe it, but it made me want to write something down. Something that i must translate into this digitalised space.

It's been a long time since i opened up this blogsphere. As though it is the forgotten palace that i used to enjoy, something abandoned but yet still felt familiar. Like the old toy or tricycle at home in a corner gathering dust. Like how when you return home after years, yet you instinctually know which switch is for which light. It used to be so in and so fun. So many memories, under the layers of dust.

I guess everything has a limited life span. a life span defined by human attention. Did we outgrew blogging? Like how we are outgrowing Facebook. Twitter can wait. Then in comes the new things like Vine - the 6 seconds video. This is how short our attention span is.

We move on. Things change.

But emotions. Intricate emotions, linked with memories which we bury within our convoluted folds of grey and white matter. From a neuroscience point of view, they are nothing but chemicals stored in the limbic hippocampal regions, interlinked like a web of highway within this mash of glial tissue. We study them, we map them, we try and try so desperately to understand the science behind them.

Yet, we fail to be intrigued by the most basic thing - aren't we all products of our emotions?

Emotions. we all feel them. Something that has no words. Something we tried to give name to, like love. Happiness. Sadness.

But they are more.

More than just a 4 lettered alphabet.

Emotions don't go away. They linger, like it or not. The effects of it, can't really be controlled.
Try burying it. Try sinking it into the depths of your mind. So desperate for time to heal, time to forget. I say, for each and every emotion there is, it only grows exponentially.

It is like a nameless energy.. it can only be translated into something else. I guess that is why we are human after all. I guess thats why people sing..write music.. draw.. dance.. just to express this primal instinct, as i am, furiously typing into this word pad, hoping it would generate some sort of music.

Emotion. We all feel it.
Yet. we cant really explain how it works.